I Need Botox!

Hoping this picture of the waters of the Pacific helps bring me some peace before publishing this post...

It's day 16 of the challenge and I was going to go all deep and into big areas of my some of my "lots in life" but since I did some of that in this post here I thought I would go a little lighter. You now get to be let in on a big "secret" of mine. I am sharing this mainly because I am currently sitting with Wally (my person) and her sister and I told them they could pick my lot in life (who ever said trusting your friends was a good idea?!). Now that the issue is the only thing on my mind I probably won't be able to focus enough to write on anything else. So, the following is what you get! Though as I type I am seriously now sweating bullets thinking about posting this. It's not as if people I meet in public don't know that it can happen. On occasion, my "secret" can be pretty noticeable. This is not a secret that I am totally excited about sharing and something I try (in vain) to hide in public. 

I need Botox!! No, it is not what you're thinking (though as this thing called aging seems to increase wrinkles, I may need it in between the eyes soon too).  I need Botox in my armpits! I sweat glisten, A LOT!! It is embarrassing and horrible and total suckage (yes I said suckage).  It goes somewhat hand in hand with the clothes I can and can't wear and the fact that I stick very closely to my comfort zone of "fashion sense".

Though I will probably never get Botox because I have no idea how my body may react to that stuff and I don't want some foreign toxins floating around in my body I consider it all the time.  I have pretty much self diagnosed myself with hyperhydrosis (because I'm a doctor and all that).  Right now I am working to overcome it by the awesome deodorant regiment that I honestly think is just in my head, but hey, it seems to help.  I shower and immediately coat my armpits with three swipes of Clinical Strength Secret and then in the morning when I wake up (or when I dress if I am leaving right after I shower) I coat each pit with 5 swipes of Degree.  Yes, this is a science people and, yes, I do count! When and why and how it seems to happen has no rhyme or reason as one moment all will be perfectly fine and the next moment it's as if someone has turned a faucet on full blast.  I am waiting to try the new Stress Induced Secret stuff.  Fingers crossed that it rocks and drys these puppies up like the Sahara. 

Until I have figured out the exact science for getting this whole thing under wraps I will continue to constantly wear tanks or t-shirts, baby powder those suckers when needed, and learn to embrace the fact that my underarms will always be just a "tad bit" moist.

*As I am sitting here freaking out and reading this post aloud to Wall she asks "Do you feel free now? Maybe, you will feel better the more you share it." Well, here's to hoping I guess.  Right now I am just sweating!

Ten Happy Things for Tuesday

It's day 14 of the blog everyday in May challenge.  Below is a list of things that put the above smile on my face and make me happy!

1.) My friends make me happy.  The ones who, despite knowing all the grizzly details of my life, have stuck by me through thick and thin.

2.) Babe makes me happy. He has this knack for making me smile even while he is pissing me off! He is just this calming, constant force that seems to keep me at peace.

3.) My little people make me very happy!! I could spend all day with them and smile through it all, even the tantrums and the defiance and the dirty diapers (or better yet when they decide to take said diaper off during their nap so that I walk in on a naked bottomed baby asleep with a dirty diaper at the foot of the crib, yes even through that I will smile. I mean how could I not with a face this cute?!).

4.) My family makes me happy, though this one does tend to have its conditions.  Happiness will ensue but so will "pull-my-hair-out, your-making-me-nutso" chaos.  Sometimes chaos seems to make me happy (though not necessarily in the blissful way; more so the familiar-old-friend way). Product of my environment?... I think that might be so.

* If you haven't noticed people make me happy! Sometimes people also frustrated the heck out of me, but I tend to look towards the optimistic when it comes to people, so... happy, people make me happy.

5.) Blogging (and blog people... see more people?!) makes me happy.  I am loving this niche I have found.  This little (or not so little, really) world inside the big world we live in.

6.) BOOKS!! These treasures make me happy.  Content, happy and at peace.  Add a hot bath into the mix and this girl has found herself a little slice of heaven on earth.

7.) Disney makes me happy! I told Babe on our trip that I sometimes think to myself that Disney really isn't the happiness ensueing place I think it is and that I make it happier in my mind when I am not there.  Nope, that's a wrong assumption.  It truly does make me happy and blissful and full of life-loving-gaiety when I am there.  True story! Catch me at Disney and you catch me happy; like kid-in-the-worlds-biggest-candy-shop happy!

8.) Tennessee makes me happy! I don't know what it is but Tennessee has always kind of just been my peaceful, happy place.  Maybe it's the people?! My Tennessee people rock! Life there just seems a little more laid back, a little more at ease, and everyone just seems to take life's punches and let them roll.  They don't really seem to sweat the small stuff.  Maybe it's all a matter of perception or the fact that we go in the summer and life is usually a little different in the summer anyways but Tennessee and it's people?! They know how to live well.  It is the one other place I would live if I didn't live here.

9.) Traveling makes me happy.  Granted this too has it's conditions because if the set-up isn't just so (as in takes place within the U.S. or on a cruise boat and I know where I am going) then I get a little anxious.  Road trips especially excite me! I could road trip it all day as long as I have a good book in my lap (and I'm sitting in the front seat or have had a Bonine, otherwise this traveler is an unhappy mess of car sickness).

10.) Happiness!! Happiness and contentment make me happy.  When I am happy or even just at peace I try to soak it in, fill up my happiness meter like it's a solar panel, because I'm going to need it to call upon when the seas get a little rough.

I loved today's topic. It is nice to think that I could keep going and that the list could do on and on (sunshine, sweet iced tea, fire in the fireplace on a cold night, God, Harry Potter).  It's nice to focus on all the things I have to be happy and thankful for.  My wish for every soul out there is that their list is long and that it grows everyday.

Dear Tidy Man I Married

Today's challenge topic to issue a public apology goes out to my sweet husband in response to a wonderful remark he made not that long ago.  Let me set up the scene a bit.  The laundry (my laundry) that had been cleaned was still sitting on the couch after about a week.  I had laid it out there after it got out of the dryer so it wouldn't wrinkle and ran out the door to go to some unknown location.  Then upon coming home I got busy and forgot all about it.  Babe didn't mention much about it, though I knew he wanted it put away.  My plan was to get it put up before he said anything, I had it scheduled and everything.  Well he got home early on said scheduled day and I had just made it into the living room to start it when he came in (as in I hear his car pull up and ran my behind in there to get started).   You could tell he was relieved to see it being done.  My response, "I'm sorry I suck at life".  He responded with a kiss on my head and an "Oh dear, you don't suck at life... just laundry." So here is my apology to him for sucking at life laundry and overall "wifeish" business.

Dearest Babe,

I apologize for the fact that laundry is something I have never been good at.  I am sorry that this leaves you to do your own because 1.) I tried to do yours once and you said it was ok that you would do it yourself (apparently wrinkles are not part of your laundry standards) and 2.) I only really do my own once a month and you need your clothes cleaned before then.  I am glad I can at least wash your boxers upon occasion as those can sit wrinkled when I forget that the clothes have been sitting in the dryer for a few days. 

I am sorry that the suitcase of clothes from our trip to Disneyland will probably sit unpacked by our bedroom door for days.  I promise to try to get it emptied (and the clothes put away in their proper place) by... Wednesday? Yes, I think Wednesday is a good goal. 

I am sorry that I forget to do things like wash the dishes and mop the floors when they need to be done because I have been busy with blogging and photos and sometimes a good book.  Thank you for bearing with me and pardoning my dust as I learn to do this acts of service thing, as that is your primary love language.

I am sorry that once each month the whole tidying thing gets even worse, need I say completely left by the wayside, as I moan on the couch while you bring me home Advil and reassurances that you love me because I get a little crazy and need the affirmation.

I am sorry that I get frustrated when, after having felt like I spent all day cleaning, you come in and hardly notice.  Mainly because, though I worked all day ("little" breaks of course), it doesn't really look like much was done.  At least not done like you would have done it and its something that should just be done so you don't consider it praise worthy (it isn't really but it's me were talking about).  You wouldn't require thanks for it and don't think about it but since words of affirmation is part of my love language I do and therefore get snippy. Sorry! It's just that getting the counters to shine without streaks is a feat against nature for me and I feel proud of myself.  I know it's silly!

Thank you for bearing with me.  For putting up with my crazy.  For being a clean and tidy man who picks up my very large amount of slack.  I love that we compliment each other and that where I will start a task and stop in the middle you will start and not stop until it is complete.  Our house truly sparkles when it has been cleaned by your hands.  I love that my "live-in-organized-chaos" soul met your "tidy-likes-everything-in-its-place" soul and that we get to live out our version of happily ever after.

Love Always,
Your Procrastinating, Laundry-hating Wife

See that smiling face? Cleaning makes him happy! I wouldn't want to take that from
him, would I?  And yes, he would be sweeping OUTSIDE.  He is insuring there will
not be leaves for people to track inside.