Books Lists and Life

Right before Thanksgiving a good friend and fellow blogger wrote, not one but two, wonderful book lists and encouraged others to do the same. The first list included the books she hopes to read in 2015. The second list was the 15 books that have made an impression on her and that she found worthy of adorning her bookshelf for a lifetime to come. You can find hers here at Boundary Stone!

These are mine...
The books that have a permanent spot on my bookshelf:

1.) The Jesus Storybook Bible, Sally Lloyd Jones- Every bookshelf needs this!

2-8.) Harry Potter (all 7)- J.K. Rowling- These book changed the trajectory of how/what I read.

9.) Mercy, Jodi Picoult 

10.) The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe, C.S. Lewis 

11.) Where the River Ends, Charles Martin, this book (and #9) changed the way I saw my marriage, made me think about it in a new way and it scared me, in a good way. 

12.) Unwritten, Charles Martin- This was my favorite fictional book of 2014 and will be added to my shelf to read again. 

13.) Jesus Calling, Sarah Young- Those quite moments with God? I need them. This book has helped me set the pace for those moments. 

14.) Redeeming Love, Francine Rivers

15.) The Story of Ferdinand, Munro Leaf- I collect children's books like it's my business, but this one, it just settles my soul. 

16.) The Night Circus, Erin Morgenstern- Because sometimes you need just one more. 

And because my love for quotes is one of the original reasons I started this blog, these are some of my favorites from the books listed above: 

* "If God had wanted us to act on instinct, He wouldn't have given us the power to reason."- Mercy

* "Do you know how you can love people more on certain days? It wasn't the way your hair looked when the sun hit it just right or the feeling of your hands locked around mine. It was because on that day, at least, you didn't give up."- Mercy

* "It is our choices that show who we are, far more than our abilities." -HP and the Chamber of Secrets

* "We are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided." -HP and the Goblet of Fire 

* "We all live, we all die, but it's the part in between that matters. To love well... that's something else. It's a choosing- something done again and again and again. No matter what. And in my experience, if you so choose, you better be willing to suffer hell." - Where the River Ends

* "I don't care what trash the world throws at you, don't let it muddy your reflection."- Where the River Ends 

* "The hurt reminded me of what was, and is, beautiful. Of what I'd known and lost. Of love given. And taken away. The more it hurt, the sweeter the memory. So while I mind the hurt, I live with it." - Where the River Ends 

* "All hearts have but one request. One simple, unspoken, undeniable need. On undeniable fear. To be known. You can stamp it. Kill it. Box it up and hem it in. Numb it and close the door. Bury it and nail it shut. Encase it in stone. But eventually, the needs of the hart will tear the door off its hinges, unearth it and crack the stone. No prison ever built could house it. Those of us who think we can are lying to ourselves. And to those next to us. Hope never dies." -Unwritten

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 "Maybe broken is not the end of things, but the beginning. Maybe broken is what happens before you become unbroken." -Unwritten

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* "Love, the real kind... is opening your bag of you and risking the most painful statement ever uttered between the stretched edges of the universe, that "this was once me."- Unwritten

So, now that I have rambled out quote after quote at you, here are the books I hope to read in 2015: 
1.) The Jesus Storybook Bible, Sally Lloyd Jones- Because I want to read this every day, for the rest of forever!
2-5.) Chronicles of Narnia (starting with Book 4)- I so want to finish this series
6.) The Meaning of Marriage, Tim Keller- I started this 4+ years ago after we got married, I would like to finish it.
7.) Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis
8.) A Life Intercepted, Charles Martin
9.) Codependent No More, Melody Beattie- Also started, closed the pages until I came to terms with the fact that I had been codependent since childhood and now I want to finish what I started.
10.) Things Christians Like, Jon Acuff- Really just anything by him, I saw him speak at the Orange Tour and the man be FUNNY! 
11.) The Light Between Oceans, M.L. Stedman- This book has been on my need to read list for 2 years now. 
12.) The Normal One, Jeanna Safer 
13.) Bad Girls of the Bible: and What we can Learn from Them, Liz Curtis Higgs 
14.) The Prodigal God, Tim Keller 
15.) Leaving Time, Jodi Picoult 

Any other recommendations of books to add to my list this year?

Unlikely Faith

This advent season, my church is walking through a series called The Way to the Manger. It is all about the women in the lineage of Jesus. Jesus wasn't born into a family of well-to-do, line-avoiding saints. Jesus was born into a family that included a background filled with woman who were no different than you or me, sinners. Sunday we heard the salvation story of a harlot names Rahab. We learned of her unlikely story of faith that saved not only her life, but the lives of all connected to her. 

How does a faith like that work? It works because of Love, true love. Deep down, kick-you-in-the-gut, more-than-my-own-life, Love. God knows our stories. He sees our hearts. He knows the ugliness and the beauty inside them. He forgives what needs to be forgiven and He fosters in us the shiny bits, the bits where He shines through. That's what makes faith look so unlikely. He's what makes an impossible love possible. All salvation stories seem unlikely, because it can seem so unlikely that we can be loved, just because. 

Maybe your salvation story is a long one, with detours and bypasses, or maybe you found God while singing in the  shower one day when you were still a kid. Or maybe you are waiting for yours to start, still thinking that it is too unlikely that with your history, your current story, that you could ever be love by Perfection, but you are! You already are. Either way the journey is never a wrapped up package in one tidy little box. Faith grows and changes. At least mine sure has. I fell in love with God the way I fall in love with most people in my life. I clung but from a distance, playing the part, making it look like I was all in, backing up when things got too close, until little-by-little, weary-step-after-weary-step, I tripped right into a relationship I couldn't get enough of. I always believed, just as I always believed in a fairytale romance and a happy, storybook ending. And then, I learned what a true fairytale looked like. I learned that it falls hard each night after a long day of living, but that it falls comforted. I learned that it is both messy and glorious, that it fights through storms that come out of a cloudless sky. I learned that it is a process. I learned that my ability to be loved had nothing to do with the things I did or didn't do, with the way I did or didn't act or with how clean my life looked. My ability to be loved just had to do with being me. Me, the sinner. Me, the daughter of a King. 

Jesus came for sinners. God called them by name and Jesus came. My sin? I call it "the dreamer". Dreaming isn't a bad thing. One should never let go of dreaming. One should however, dream righteously. I didn't dream that way. I created fantasies in my head of things I knew that God would never want for my life. Sure that picture looked pretty, it looked fun, it looked inviting; sin typically does. But what I was really doing was pulling myself out of my reality. I lived in a world of "what ifs" and not what is- a world that wasn't mine at all, but some unknown character in some unknown world that just happened to resemble my life. I am learning the whys- to avoid pain, to create a wall to deal with loss, to live in a pretend world where pretend hearts can only get pretend broken. But that's living a lie, one that can ultimately do nothing but shatter your reality. I guess if I was being honest with myself I would have to call "the dreamer" lust. I would lust for things that would ultimately lead to my destruction. I lusted for a world where I could pretend bad things didn't happen, because I was afraid of loosing everything I held close (maybe, that makes my sin fear- fear and lust). I lusted for a heaven here on Earth.  But we aren't promised that. We lost that when our human nature out won our God nature and sin entered the world. Heaven here on Earth, that would now be a place without the direct nearness of God and that isn't Heaven at all. 

So, I am learning to dream righteously. I am learning to dream of the impossible possibilities because they are God possibilities and not me possibilities. I am learning to shut off the pictures in my head that tell me I am not right where I should be or to take those fantasies at face value and jot down the idea for what could make a "wonderful" fiction story, if only I could finish it. That was always the problem with my "dreams", they never had an ending. They never had an ending because they ever got to the part where real life came into play. They never got to the part where they had to deal with real issues; with sadness, death, change or new beginnings. They never had an ending because the real ending to any true story comes when I can say, face-to-face to the God who loves me in spite of all my sin, "I have fought the good fight, I have kept the faith" and He can tell me "welcome Home."  

Christmas Wish List 2014

Dearest Santa, if you need

some ideas for what to put under the tree

Here area few of 

my favorite things!! 

1.) My top books for this season!! I have yet to read Unwrapping the Greatest Gift but so want to have this treasury for years to come as we celebrate Christmas both as a couple and someday as a growing family. I am currently reading the Jesus Storybook Bible and I can NOT put it down. Since my copy is borrowed from work I would love to have one of my very own. EVERY child, big and small, should own this book!! 

2.) Oh how I love movies!! Santa Babe gets me some each year, but in case he needs so help these are the ones that my heart would cherish. Saving Mr. Banks is a movie I could watch for hours on end. 

3.) I LOVE Ashley Brooke Designs mugs and this is my current new fave!! 

4.) Popcorn!! Popcorn is my love! There is a dance, there is a process, don't judge!! But how much cooler would my popping experience be with Mickey Ears?! 

5.) Bees!! I want bees in my backyard! Glorious, buzzing, wonderful bees!! The Williams and Sonoma Backyard Beekeeping Kit is my ultimate dream. 
** Disclaimer- I know that both #4 and #5 are pipe-dream presents. "Santa" has repeatedly told me that our yard is not well suited for bees and will also tell me that logically our current stove popper is a more sensible way of popping corn! I will therefore settle with a stocking filled with popcorn for my stovetop and... 

6.) Honey!! I love honey, hence why I want bees. This cute little tea kit from the Savannah Bee Company would be right up my alley. Though I do love all kinds of honey and do not discriminate. I try to always have local honey on hand for allergy purposes, but I do not currently have a little honey keeper and the little bottle is perfect for on the go use! Yes, I take honey on-the-go! I have some hidden in nooks and crannies at all my frequented stops. 

Linking up with A. Liz Adventures and friends for My Favorite Things 2014! 

Saving Mr. Banks, Saving Innocence

"The rain brings life- so does the sun." -Saving Mr. Banks 

When one thinks Disney or Mary Poppins, they think happy thoughts. They think magic. But I have so often found that magic is given to the areas in our lives that we fear the sting of reality. Addiction is messy. It is messy and ugly and it takes away so much. Yet, it is very much a part of reality. Saving Mr. Banks hits that reality on the head in the most real of ways. But it also saves something too. It saves innocence and it saves magic. I have never been one who likes to watch realistic movies. I prefer my movies (and books for that matter), with enough fantasy to pull me out of the world for just a brief moment in time. I don't mean that in the sense that I watch only far out fantasies or pure science-fiction. I mean that I prefer movies with enough reality that they could almost be real, if it weren't for the fact that they aren't because there is far more that the movie doesn't show you. They leave out the messy and broken bits. Or they weave them together in such a way that they are all well and mended by the time the credits roll. I don't tend to watch documentaries or read biographies. Even Sundance movies are far too real world for me. Which is exactly why the story of Mary Poppins is something I can't stop watching. It is the hard and bitter truth of reality, of one grown child's story of addiction, told through the magic of one man's imagination, to paint for her a world in which things ended up alright. 

I watch Saving Mr. Banks and my heart breaks and mends and breaks and mends time after time. It breaks for the little girl who covers for a father she loves. It mends for the woman who opens her heart to the forgiveness she denied herself. It breaks for the cruel reality that addiction brings into people's lives. It mends for the resiliency we have within our hearts to keep going when it takes everything away. 

When I watch saving Mr. Banks I see my own story. I hear the lies you tell yourself to pretend it all away. I see broken people, wearing the physical faces of breaking hearts. I think about all the questions, the questions screamed outwardly and inwardly. When I watch Saving Mr. Banks I can't help but think about the questions that my niece won't have to ask because she was never old enough to understand what was going on around her in the heat of a relapse. But I wonder too about what questions she will ask the older she gets and knows fully the reality that her dad isn't here. I dread the day she asks why. How do you explain to anyone, at any age, the truth behind addiction? I still don't understand it. 

When she is three you can tell her that her daddy is in her heart and that he is with Jesus and that he loves her and that is and always will be true, but what about the day when she wants more? Yet, in it all there are things to be thankful for. Thankful that she was too young to realize what was going on, thankful that she was too young to be made into a crutch to hold up a world that was falling apart around her. I am thankful for the fact that she can hold onto magic, that we all can. When we loose that innocence, that magic, we turn our backs on the hope that life can have beauty. When we loose that, we build walls around our hearts. Walls that have thorns to keep out anything that can hurt us. We build fortresses around our battered hearts to protect us. Fortresses that shoot arrows to fend off anything at all; love, pain, life and death. I know, because I have been there. Keep out the good to keep out the bad. 

Life on Earth? Addiction? The reality of all the painful things? They are hard, brutal and messy. There is no way around that and no way to prepare for it. But I have hope and faith in the things that I can not see. I know that someday I will live in a world without pain and without tears. I will live in a Kingdom with no walls, because they won't be needed and that is no fairytale. That is the magic, that is the ending to the story- and the beginning. That is the reality that changed all realities. Walt Disney took Mary Poppins and he saved Mr. Banks. God sent us Jesus and He saved the whole world. It hurts- He never promised it wouldn't- that believing doesn't mean we all get to live here on Earth together until we are old and feel that we have fully lived. It hurts that people leave before we are ready for them to. Free will and the choices we make often hurt us, but there is the Promise of a life forever. And I will hold onto that. I will hold onto that and the innocence of a child-like heart. The innocence and magic of a child-like heart that can find beauty in the most messy of stories. 

My 5 Cruising Essentials

Going on a boat, going on a boat... 

The excitement in our house is building!! Or at least mine is. Babe is currently doing his typical 'clean-the-house, going-on-a-trip' prep. I won't mention the fact that I actually cleaned (alert the media) on Tuesday and though he was proud of me, he was apparently not that impressed, because he is cleaning everything I already cleaned. I think it calms his nerves. I don't get it, but I guess that's what makes us work. He's the ying to my yang, what can I say? So while I do my nails and finish the rest of what I consider actual cruise prep, he is prepping the house (ok, I get it, people are staying here while we are gone. But they are family and the house looks great... in my opinion). Since I am currently stuck at the computer while the floors dry I figured I would finish up my 5 cruising essentials. 

1.) Devotions!- I love my devotion time on a cruise! There is so much more of it. At home I read Jesus Calling each morning. I always intend to do more, to at least jot down some of my 1000 gifts. But the time just goes so quickly in the morning. I know I need my one-on-one God time, but God doesn't seem to mind that most of it happens while I shower. As soon as they invent a waterproof book and pen set I will be golden!! I started keeping a list of my own 1000 gifts right before our cruise last year. I am now up to 200. At home this seems to get neglected. I will sit down every so often and put down ones I had been trying to keep track of in my mind. But with all the time I have in the mornings to sit in the sun, eat my grapefruit and loaded down plate of pastries, I am able to write down all the little ones that have gotten past over in the rush to get out the door: "I will miss yous" from Makaylin, sister time, best friends, fires on a cold night... I am also SOOOOOO so very excited that The Jesus Storybook Bible is going to be part of my mornings on this trip. I have been wanting to read it FOR-E-VER and figured this was the perfect opportunity!! 

2.) Sun Basking Reading Material!- This is a crucial point as I plan to be doing a whole lot of nothing! But I can not do nothing without a book. I have been wanting to read Harry Potter on a cruise since we started cruising a few years back, so I am going to be one excited reader on this trip. Reread the entire HP series again form start to finish and it couldn't have fallen at a better time! 

3.) Sunless Tanner- I love my Sunless Tanner from Rodan and Fields! I never believed in sunless tanner before I found this. I tried multiple tanners and nothing worked, so I gave up. I gave it another try when a friend put me onto Rodan and Fields. This is my jam!! It started with just my legs and then when I saw pictures with my legs looking like I lived in Hawaii and my body looking like I lived in Forks I braved doing my arms and was so satisfied with how streak-free it came out that I did my face the next time. It was great! No splotches, sun-baked-skin and no harmful, wrinkling rays! The perfect companion for cruising! 

4.) Face Protection- I love my MBS hat!! I may be biased, but I think it looks pretty spiffy and it keeps the sun out of my eyes while I read. So very proud of my Daddy and the men behind Mind, Body and Soul Surfing Company.

5.) Bucket List Check-off plans!- When we cruise we don't go through the ship for our excursions. Yes, it can be a little more risky. But...

a.) It saves money, a lot of it usually. The cruise gets a nice cut of the money for the excursions you book through the boat. They often use their own guides and they set up all of the arrangements. It also insures that the boat will not leave you if something happens during the tour (hopefully this will never come back to bite us in the fanny). 

b.) You get a more local, off-the-beaten-path experience. This can also be risky, but totally worth it. The cruise ship excursions all tend to be packed with people from any number of cruise ships docked at the same port. The beaches they may take you to are so full you can't find a spot for your stuff. We like to research where we are going and see if there is any thrill seeking, local, hidden spots we can find. This trip? Cliff diving in Curacao and/or the Dominican Republic, swimming in the natural pool in Aruba and lighthouse exploring in Grand Turk!! 

Any other cruisers out there? I love hearing tips about cruise experiences or any excursions that people would recommend. 

Linking up today with the lovely ladies of the 5 on Friday!